Tuesday, october 28 , 2008

          Saw her on msn today but i do not have the courage to msn her.I am afraid of getting negative replies or even make her think i am a nuisance.From the dm of hers msn..inoe tat she had found a new bf..feel happy for her for found a love one..
          I really don't know want to say what anymore but i can just say is that i miss her alot n still love her deeply. My life is messed up without her....everything is falling apart.... 
           I don't know i can hold on for how long ...i am really trying my best to make things work again and for her to feel love and regain confidence in me again... I love you so so much and missing you every minutes i breathe...
          As long as i still breathe,i will still try and hope...

Monday , 27 October , 2008

               laz nite cant slp..i feel asleep around 6 or 7...then early morning 8 am let a little kid that stay at my hse permentely wake me up... then cant slp anymore...
            I don't know what to say or what to think.When i saw my frens happily with their love one i am jealous and envy them.I hope all of them can be togehter happily but when i see them so sweet together,my heart just sink.
               How i wish i could be like them if there is more tolerance and understanding between us things will not be this way.I must admit that i did not handle thing properly..If i had not been so cold and inconsiderate i think we will not end up this way.After she left me i just try to forget everything and focus on my study.
               I will never get use to not having her by my side and i still hope that in the deepest part of her heart one day will tell her to come back to me.Can she really forget how we pull through togather when we work thing out togather.Can she really forget this relationship?I hope i will get an answer one day,i love her too too much..

              Today,someone asked me why i still care abt her even passed so long..i dont know what to answer..maybe i really love her too musch le..still cant forget abt her ..
                Really don't know what i am doing these days. Life is just not the same after she left,lost motivation in everything i do. Lost all sense of direction in life le...
               I tried to be happy but fail each time. Regardless how long it take,i think i will never forget her. It take a min or a day to love someone but take more then a lifetime to forgot someone..... Miss her so much..

sunday , october 19, 2008

Today went out for lunch ..on the way there hear a song from the radio although it is quite long / out dated but its relli meaningful its made mie think abt her.. i really miss her so much..http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbIgdoY5TBk
                            Hannah Montana- I Miss You
                                       Sha la la la la
                                       Sha la la la la
                                You used to call me your angel
                      Said I was sent straight down from heaven
                           You'd hold me close in your arms
                           I loved the way you felt so strong
                           I never wanted you to leave
                     I wanted you to stay here holding me
                                         [CHORUS]
                                          I miss you
                                      I miss your smile
                                   And I still she'd a tear
                                    Every once in a while
                         And even though it's different now
                                You're still here somehow
                                My heart won't let you go
                                  And I need you to know
                                  I miss you, sha la la la la
                                              I miss you
                            You used to call me your dreamer
                            And now I'm living out my dream
                                Oh how I wish you could see
                           Everything that's happening for me
                                 I'm thinking back on the past
                           It's true that time is flying but too fast

friday, october 17 , 2008

PMR finally ended. Feel happy for the eam ended but feel like...feel hollow?I write this blog..not to hope she back to me..but just wanna write out..how much i miss her every single day..Time passed so damm fast..We break for some time le..but i still miss her so much..every day n night..
     That day when we break..even i not willing to..but..i cant do anything..i know she wont change her mind when she decided something..Wonder if there is still any love left in her for me or do she still miss me at times?If i can turn back the hands of times,i will still choose to be with her and will still love her with all my heart.To try my best to give her happiness and all the support she want,mentally,physcially,security and sense of belonging.Even though the end might be the same as now,i will still love her with all my heart.....
     She gaves me sweet memories that i will remember forever,memories that i can't shut out of my mind....